I have a confession to make. Yesterday afternoon when I wrote “Make Your Choices with Integrity” I didn’t quite finish it the way I wanted to so I saved what I had, picked Justen up at the airport in Omaha, went to Tecumseh for Taylor’s Honor Choir concert, and when we got home a couple games of pool were played and we were chatting as a family… then we had a visitor come to the door around 10 p.m. I had just told Corey that when he was done on the computer that I needed to get on really quick and upload my blog post for the day. (I was just planning on quick ending it while I did that.) When we heard the knock on the door our visitor wanted to see Justen, but then she pulled me alone in the kitchen to share with me some very disturbing news. A former co-worker of mine (and present school-mate of Taylor’s) was found dead. She didn’t know any details at that time. My heart was so heavy. I had just seen him a few days ago. Chit-chatted with him. I didn’t see any warning signs at all. And now our town has lost another precious life, a person with a bunch of potential, and another family is hurting and grieving the loss of a child…. I know what they’re going through, but I know it’s not quite the same. No one’s grieving is ever the same. What I do know is that they are grieving for his future and the loss of making any more memories with this valued individual, and I am grieving NEVER being given the chance to make any memories with my loved daughter. So after our visitor left I broke the news to the rest of the family. I wanted Taylor to hear this from me and not randomly at school. So… eventually when the situation had been talked over and our good-nights said, my thoughts went back to my blog post. I pulled up what I had written and I couldn’t think of a way to end it. So I didn’t. I posted it ‘as is’!
This morning, heart still heavy and after getting hardly any sleep, I pulled up both of my 31 Days Devotionals and today's prayer focus for Corey is 'Relationships'. As with almost every other day, I think about and pray for Corey, but I also use the scripture verses, thoughts and focus in my own life as well. And as I sat here thinking about my friend (especially after learning that he took his own life) I began to play back the conversations that I had had with him lately. I began to search my memory of any warning signs that I might have missed, any facebook posts that would've sent up a red flag. I couldn't think of any. So then I began wondering if there were signs there, but I was too busy with other things and didn't put enough stock in some of my 'relationships' to see there was a problem. I truly hope that is not the case, but we as human beings, were put on this earth for a number of reasons - and one of those reasons is to love others.
Hebrews 10:24-25 says, "And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near."
Well, I can tell you, after everything that had transpired I really wasn't in the mood to "Praise" while doing my 31 Days of Praise devotional. BUT... I am determined to follow through, so I opened up my book to day six.
The first paragraph pretty much blew me away! Here it is, " I magnify You, my God, for Your absolute purity, holiness, and justice, as the Judge to whom all people must give account. I praise You that Your fairness is intertwined with everything You do... that when the time is ripe You will end all sin and injustice, all corruption, all immorality... that You will right all wrongs and reward all loving service and suffering for Your sake." (This was taken directly from the verses: Ps. 99:3, 9; Dan. 4:37; Rom. 14:12; Deut. 32:4; Is. 2:10-12; Rom. 12:19; Heb. 6:10)
This situation was NOT God attacking us, it was NOT God punishing us. We live in a fallen world. We make decisions each and every day about our choices - whether they are good or bad. But how you help others that you have a relationship with - that will make differences in people's lives. If you had the cure for cancer, would you share it? Well, I don't have the cure for cancer or any other disease (but I wish I had the cure for infertility!), but I do know how we can live in eternity with our heavenly Father. Start a relationship with Him. And He will give you love for others!
Love and Peace to All!
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