26 plus 5 . . .

I know, I usually round up to 27 weeks when I'm talking about when we found out that Calleigh Joy's gorgeous little heart had stopped beating for absolutely no reason that anyone could find.  It's just an easier way to say it - 27 weeks. Instead of saying, "I was 26 plus 5 weeks along".  If it would've made a difference in the outcome of whether or not she'd be here, I'd definitely say 26 plus 5, but the reality is that she's gone and there's nothing I can do about it. So technically, I was at 26 plus 5 weeks when she entered heaven for eternity.

That brings me to today.

Today, on August 25th, 2012, I am exactly 26 weeks plus 5 days along with Brayden and Payzleigh.   I have to admit, I have a real sense of peace today. A feeling that I know people are lifting me and my family up in prayer. Knowing that God is in control no matter what happens and He wants to grant the desires of my heart, but also knowing that He sees the whole picture and I only see what's right in front of me, brings a comfort that I can not describe.

This past week has been full of CJ.  Last Sunday we took part in a butterfly release that the group "Remembering Our Children" sponsors every August in Lincoln.

Then on Wednesday morning I got an unexpected message that Calleigh's foundation for her stone was FINALLY going to be placed that afternoon!  Not that we weren't expecting it, we've just been expecting it since last Memorial Day!

Now hopefully in the next couple weeks her stone will be completed and placed!

Back to Brayden and Payzleigh - my next appointment is this coming up Wednesday.  Two weeks ago when I was there I was told that I could come in anytime that I needed to and to make my appointment for two weeks, but to play it by ear if I needed to come in before that.  There were a couple of moments for me that I really thought about it, but then the peace that surrounded me overcame my doubt and I ended up NOT being paralyzed in my fear like I was afraid I'd be.  I know that is because of everyone's prayers for us! So, thanks again!

The last several nights they have kicked Corey so hard that he's felt it without even actually trying to! As we've prayed together before bed they have wanted to "join in" too, and they jump around and make such a ruckus that it distracts our prayer time and we have to take a break and laugh at them for a minute! :)  And then this morning I was looking at an online site that makes the cutest little girl clothes.  Every time I said the word "paisley", as in 'I wonder if she has any cute little paisley outfits for sale', Payzleigh Hope would give me the hardest, swiftest kick. It happened about three different times!  It was almost as if she recognized her name!  (of course I don't really think she does, but it was a fun little coincidence!)

Well, I'm off for today! It's finally time I started getting their room ready upstairs.  I think I've been putting it off for far too long . . .

Peace and Love to All!