CJ's Letter to Mommy

(this was an assignment that I had to do for one of my grief counseling sessions)

Dear Mommy,

I Love You so much. I miss you and Daddy and Brother and Sister so much, too! But heaven is so awesome! There is a guy here who lived inside the belly of a big fish, and there is another guy who built this huge boat for the very first flood and he saw the very first rainbow. I have so many friends here and Grandpa Bob, Grandma Goldie, Grandma Grace, Ma and Pa are all here! As soon as I arrived they were all waiting to hug me and love me and tell me all about you and Dad. And mom, guess what? Jesus is here too! Mary Lea and I love to go and sing to Him.

Mary Lea taught me “Jesus Loves Me”, “Jesus Loves the Little Children”, and “I Have the Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy Down in My Heart”. That’s my favorite one ‘cause it has my name in it! We sing together a lot! Mary Lea told me that you will teach me that song in Spanish when you get here.

Mommy, I know that this has been very hard on you. Grandma Goldie told me what it was like for her when Uncle Bobby died (he’s here too!), so I could understand what you’re feeling. Mommy, I wanted to send this to you to let you know I’m OK, and to let you know that I don’t want you to feel guilty. First of all, on Tuesday’s you don’t need to feel bad anymore. I know you had me on a Tuesday, but all Tuesday’s should not be miserable for you. I also can imagine that when you see or hear about other mommies either getting ready to have a baby or with their new babies that that would break your heart. Mommy, I want you to know that I miss you so much, and I am so excited that we will be together for eternity!

Mommy, I want you and Daddy to be happy! You can miss me, but you still need to be joyful. And when you are being joyful you will remember me ‘cause that’s my name – Calleigh Joy! I love my name so much, it is so pretty!

Mommy, if you and Daddy and God decide to have another baby I want you to know that I think that would be great! I would love to share my room, my pack-n-play, my toys, my clothes, my crib, my swing, my bouncy seat, my car seat, my diaper bag, my changing table and my diapers with my baby brother or sister! And if it’s a baby sister you won’t even need to paint our room! (If it’s a brother you probably will want to!) Even if you decide not to have another baby of your own and you let kids come and live with you that need a place to stay for a while, I want them to use my room too!

Mommy, remember at the beginning of this letter I told you how much Mary Lea and I love to sing to Jesus? Well, it is time for you to start singing to Jesus again. He told me He misses hearing you make music – either by playing the piano or singing, and Taylor needs to hear you praising God right now. So please start making beautiful music again, and in no time at all we will all be here together praising and singing and glorifying God together!

Please give Daddy, Justen and Taylor my love! And please forgive people when they say insensitive things, they don’t really mean to!

I Love You Mommy!

Calleigh Joy

~Your Beautiful Happiness


  1. Dear Calleigh Joy, I read your letter with many tears, for you see on January 18th, I not only lost a precious little Granddaughter but I also lost a daughter, and that makes me very, very sad. I do not know how to comfort her. It seems whenever we talk it's like talking to a stranger. I'm afraid to say things for fear she'll take them the wrong way and it will make her more unhappy. She's all pulled up inside like a butterfly still in the cocoon. It's not your fault she is behaving like this, maybe time and much prayer will help. I have a broken heart so I think it won't be long and we'll be together, and I can sing with you and MaryLee. Love, Grandma Barb

  2. This is PRECIOUS!! wow, brings tears to my eyes. Such joy...

  3. P.S. I saw in your album on facebook a little plaque with a butterfly and lily of the valley on it and it says "Rejoice Always." I LOVE it!!! My little Lily and butterflies mean a lot to me. Where did you get it? If you could email me the info. on it to roseandherlily@gmail.com, I'd appreciate it so much!!